Alcoholics Anonymous Oregon Area 58
Hospitals Committee:
INSIDE OUT
Volume 1, Article 4
Experience, Strength and Hope
As I awoke this morning, I knew that today was
the day that I would set aside some time to write a
short story about my journey in sobriety. I also knew
that a friend that I am a sponsor to would be coming
by my home to visit and share with me. I started my
morning prayer, as I always do, asking God for
guidance for this day, and saying the Third Step
Prayer.
Murray, the Oregon Area Hospitals Chair, had
asked me, quite awhile ago, to write the part of my
life experience about my getting sober while living at
the Oregon State Hospital.
It is now late afternoon, and it’s a beautiful
summer day. My sponsee was here this morning,
sharing with me her Fifth Step. We also processed the
Sixth Step, and went on to the Seventh Step, praying
the Seventh Step prayer together. As I sit now in the
warm sun, with a glass of ice tea and fresh vegetables
from the garden to munch on, I am once again filled
with hope and gratitude that has been given each, and
everyone of us that has been blessed with the gift of
sobriety.
I do remember the days when I was drinking, cheap
wine, was homeless, living in a tent, unable to
provide for my son who was being shifted from house to
house living with relatives. As my story goes, I was
arrested, one more time, and was detoxing while in
jail and was taken to the Newport hospital to keep
from dying. While I was there, a lady named Connie,
who was a dedicated member of Alcoholics Anonymous
came to the hospital and Twelfth Stepped me. She
shared with me for a few hours, her recovery story.
What she gave me was hope that maybe I could stay
sober a day at a time. From that hospital I was
shipped over to the Oregon State Mental Hospital in
Salem, Oregon. I stayed there for several months, and
while I was there I attended two A.A. meetings a week.
I looked forward to the members of A.A. that came
from the outside to share the program of recovery with
us. Connie would come to visit me once a month and
tried to help me, but I wasn’t willing to go to any
length to stay sober. The First Step was easy for me
to admit that I was powerless. It was the Second Step
that I made difficult.
When I was released from the state hospital, I
went back to the coast, got a job and a place for my
son and I to live in. Life was getting better, but I
was still miserable. I went to meetings real
regularly, but I wasn’t working the steps, or doing
service work. I hadn’t made an effort to trust God,
or clean house. I ended up in the psych ward sober.
One would think that would get my attention, but it
was all about poor me. Even though the doctors said
you need to be grateful just for the fact you haven’t
accomplished killing yourself yet! After leaving
there I continued to stay dry, but ended up getting
drunk when I stopped going to meetings.
Once again, I was Twelfth Stepped, and went
through a worse detox. This time I knew that if I was
going to stay sober, that I needed to truly surrender
my will and life over to the care of God. When I
sincerely did the Second and Third Step my life
changed instantly. I went back to A.A. meetings, and
by the grace of a very loving God and this A.A.
fellowship I was welcomed back with open arms. I
started right away getting involved in A.A. service
work. I became an active member of my A.A. home
group. Than I continued to serve on the Intergroup
committees, and became active at the Oregon Area
involved in General Service. I’ve been sober since
that day, February 21, 1982. I truly believe what has
been passed on to us, “ that you have to give it away
to keep it!”
My sober life has been full of joy, heartaches,
challenges, miracles and many blessings. The many
Promises that are in our A.A. Big Book have all come
true for me. I know today that God is Good, and God
is Love. I also know and believe what I heard early
on in A.A. meetings, that God treats us, His children,
all equal, and that He will bless us all the same, if
we let Him. I also know that I am one drink away from
a drunk, and that for me to stay sober, I need to
continue to Trust God, Clean house, and work with
others.
With warmest A.A. love,
Darlene G.
Oregon Area #58
Panel 52 Delegate
Hospitals Main Page
