Alcoholics Anonymous Oregon Area 58
Hospitals Committee:
INSIDE OUT
Volume 1, Article 1
The Amazing Journey
I’m currently a resident of the state hospital. This is my second experience
being incarcerated, and I hope that it’s my last. The first time that
I was incarcerated was in 1989, I did 9 months in the county jail for possession
and manufacturing of a controlled substance. As I write this letter of my
sobriety and experiences in the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, I am filled
with gratitude for the many blessings in my life, and with an abundance of
hope for the future. Three years ago, I couldn’t imagine the amazing
journey I was about to undertake, a journey which continues as long as I am
able to stay away from the first drink “one day at a time.” I
used alcohol off and on for about 14 years. The use increased as I got older
and took on more responsibility and stress in my life. I believe my alcohol
abuse had a great deal to do with my mental health, trying to self medicate
some of the mental agony of depression from the relationships that I was trying
to pursue. One time I was able to quit drinking for months and even one time
for 10 years--as long as I was going to A.A. and/or attending church on a
regular basis.
My last drink took place in Springfield OR, October 12th 1999. It’s
clear for me to see now that I do need AA and a good sponsor in my everyday
life for total success. I can’t do it alone. I’d forgotten that
I was an alcoholic and I picked up the first drink. Today, the great fact
of my life is that I am an alcoholic and that I will be an alcoholic for the
rest of my life.
My drinking and drug use were characterized by an overwhelming desire to escape
the reality of my life. I was uncomfortable in my own skin except when I drank.
I never had any control over the amount I would drink or what might happen.
Staying sober and helping other alcoholics to achieve sobriety is truly my
first priority today. I have a Higher Power in my life that gives me everything
I need, and as my will aligns more closely to His will for me, He fulfills
a lot of my wants as well. My sponsor guided me through the twelve steps.
I am blessed with wonderful friends, both men and women, most of who are in recovery. Keeping an eye out for newcomers is a cornerstone of my program,
and a practice from which I receive many benefits. I go to meeting every day
that I can, and a day doesn’t go by when I don’t remember that
I am an alcoholic in need of the help and support AA offers. I’m also
so grateful for the people who come in from the outside to share their experience,
strength and hope. My advice to anyone out there who thinks they’ve
got a problem with alcohol or drugs is this--surrender today. If you are in
A.A. stay, don’t let the disease have a second chance. If you take A.A.
seriously, you will stay sober, because if you go out, you may not come back.
And innocent people may pay for your choice to drink one more time.
B. (male, age 30)
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